If You're a Guy
Episode Dumb Dumbwaiter
Character(s) Sunil Nevla
Vinnie Terrio
Russell Ferguson
Sung by Peter New
Kyle Rideout
Sam Vincent
Length 1:04
Season Season 1
Episode Transcript Dumb Dumbwaiter
International versions

If You're a Guy (spelled If You're A Guy in The Hub's game Pet Shop Rock)[1] is a song sung by the male pets in Dumb Dumbwaiter while they are having a time with the girls away. The song is a parody of "Jet Song" from the American musical West Side Story.

Composer Daniel Ingram thanked "David Corman for his great production work on it and Roger Eschbacher for the perfect lyrics".[2]


If you're a guy
If you're a guy
You're a pet who's the best
Say so long and goodbye
To those feminine pests
If you're a guy
You can spend all your time
In a coat and a tie
Singing lyrics that...
Sunil: Sound very good with the other lyrics.
Oh, what can I say, musical theater was never my strong suit.
If you're a guy
You don't need any girls
Come on and let's try
To do some manly dance twirls
Vinnie: Hoo-wah!
Russell: Oh, yeah!
Sunil: Oh, ooh, wrong way!
You can burp without fear
You can scratch it when it itches
You can wiggle your rear
In your stylish new trousers
Vinnie: What?
Sunil: I tried to tell you!
[Russell and Vinnie]
Who needs (Sunil: Who needs)
Those girls (Sunil: Those girls)
They're bossy (Sunil: So bossy!)
And gross (Sunil: But they smell nice!)
[Russell, Sunil, and Vinnie]
If you're a guy
You're a pet
With the most!

Awards and nominations

"If You're a Guy" was nominated for "Outstanding Original Song - Children and Animation" in the 40th Daytime Emmy Awards.[3]


Season 1
Theme Song | The Littlest Pet Shop Pets | Dance Like You Know You Can | BFF's | I'm Sorry Song | Fun Being Fun | Be Yourself | Crush | If You're a Guy | Gotta Get To The Studio | Superstar Life | The Sweet Shop Song | Humanarian | Miss Anna T, If You Please | Wolf-i-fied | My New Tail | Lost and Found Box | Stay Here Forever | It Won't Be Long
Season 2
F.U.N. Song | Two Times as Cute | I-Guana Rhumba | Dino-pets | Pet Friendly Skies | Come to the Littlest Pet Shop | Chez Paris | Dance Fu Fighting | Biskit Twins Rhapsody | Two For One | Song of Brazil | Just Unplug | Cyril McFlip | All Around The World | Won't Have To Look Too Far
Season 3
Hangin' by a Thread | A Perfect Day | Treasure Out Of Trash | My Biggest Secret | Chase Away the Winter Blues | A Different Kind of Girl | If I Could Talk to the Humans | Biskit Family Business | You're the One | A Skunk is a Skunk | Breathless | Pets and Humans
Season 4
Not Every Star is in the Sky | Hearty Time Pet Food Jingle | Dude is a Vampire | The Tiniest Animal Store Jingle | Can't Give Up | Summer Sunsations | Pain and Suffering | The Guilty Tango | Pawrista's Coffee | To Tell You The Truth
Minor Songs
This Is a New Adventure | Don't You Just Wanna Sing Just Like Me? | It's a Dancing Day | Listen Up! | Sprinkles on My Head | "Howdy Do" Song | My Small Squirrel | We're Havin' a Party, Party | El Cobra Cabra | Secret Cupid Song | Pain and Suffering
Dance Party | Girl Time | Everything You Do is My Pet Peeve | Fabulous Song | Boys Don't Care About Clothes | So Like Bored | OmmmMG | What's Next? | Fourth unnamed new short song
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